Things You Shouldn't Do
by Rin Sessys Girl
Summary: ONESHOT. This is just a thing to pass the time. Yugi's had a bad day, so what does he do to make up for it? Create a list of things not to do that's what!


Desclaimer: I don't own Yu-Gi-Oh. God forbid what would happen if I did. Probably chaos and unreal creatures running amuck, but that would so be me... Well anyway this is just a side thing and clearly a one shot seeing how I was bored when writing this and needed to relieve some stress. So expect out of character ness and humor.

Yugi, and lets not forget the Pharaohs spirit that resided in his body, had simply had a long and possibly worst day in their entire lives and seeing how the Pharaoh was a five thousand old spirit that was saying a lot. To put it simple it was just not their day at all.

Now, Yugi was residing in his room dressed in his pajamas sitting at his desk, a pencil in hand and a blank piece of paper before him.

"What should we write?" He said to what seemed like no one when truthfully there was someone just not seen by others.

"A list." The Pharaoh said thoughtful, a voice only heard by his counter part. The unseen figure of the Pharaoh, or preferably referred to as Yami, was sitting on the edge of the desk looking down at Yugi and the paper as he spoke.

"A list?" Yugi questioned tapping the pencil on the desk and leaning his face into his free hands' palm. "Hmm... How about of things we shouldn't do?" He laughed out.

Yami smiled slightly and slid off the desk to stand by the shorter boy. "Why not? It should prove to be entertaining."

"But I was only kidding!" Yugi said scratching the back of his head with a sheepish grin on his face while anime sweat dropping.

"Well I happen to be quite serious." Yami stated bluntly. "Let's start shall we?"

"Well if-"

"Yugi? Yugi is someone in there with you?" The voice of Solomon, or in other words, Yugi's grandpa, was suddenly heard from behind his door quite literally banging on it and sounding crazed as can be.

"-yooo-NO! No ones in here Grandpa! Just um...me talking to myself eh heh heh!" Yugi said scratching the back of his head again nervously with a sheepish grin that could not be seen by his Grandpa seeing how he was on the other side of the door.

The banging stopped then, "Well that better be the case young man! I better not find any girls in there with you! Or I'll, I'll... not allow you to go dueling for as long as I please and take away your deck!" Solomon sounded like a raging bull, and rather hilariously opened the door with steam flaring out of his nose like a snorting anime bull and crazed eyes.

Yugi could only stare in helpless disbelief at the appearance his Grandpa was in thinking, 'He didn't get in the cookie jar again did he!'

The Pharaoh on the other hand could only laugh at the predicament, seeing how Solomon wouldn't hear him and just Yugi would hear him it really wouldn't matter.

"The cookie jar! You can't be serious! This isn't what happens when he gets in the cookie jar is it?" He howled in hoots of laughter, his transparent form rolling on the ground as he laughed slapping the side of the desk.

'Unfortunately it is..." Yugi thought with a frown turning back to the paper to quickly scribble down in fine writing.

_Things You Shouldn't Do._

_1. Don't leave out the cookie jar or Grandpa will get into it._

"Yugi! What are you writing there?" Solomon demanded moving towards his side to look over his shoulder. "Don't leave out the cookie jar... COOKIE JAR!" He cackled strangely and ran in circles for a moment before zooming out of the room crying out… "COOKIES!"

By then Yami was crying in his mirth of laughter slowly pulling him self off the floor, wiping his tears away to look down at the list.

"Don't leave out the cookie jar or Grandpa will get into it! AHAHAHAHAHAHA! That's so true!" He said immediately cracking up once more.

Yugi sighed and shook his head as the Pharaoh began to laugh some more.

_2. Don't duel within the presence of real duel monsters you might almost find yourself stepped on._

Again the Pharaoh pulled himself together and got back up to his feet to read over the second one.

"Oooh...I remember that day." He grimaced out. "That was a close call."

"Yeah it was." Yugi agreed, "Maybe you'll remember this one too..."

_3. Don't attempt dueling a real duel monster..._

Yami laughed, "I do remember that! A Red Eyes Black Dragon, to the point we were covered in sut, fried us. It took forever to get it out of our clothes and hair..."

"Exactly. Now that I look back on it, it was pretty funny wasn't it?" Yugi laughed softly.

_4. Under no condition attempt using the edges of your card as a ninja's throwing star to protect yourself._

_5. Don't miss place your deck._

_6. Don't sleep with your deck or you may wake up to find a card in your mouth..._

_7. Under no condition try to kill someone with a card, it just doesn't work._

_8. NEVER use a card the enemy gives you; it might result in your own destruction._

_9. Don't get on Tea's bad side; she tends to be scary when she's angry._

_10. Don't go near psychos with items; they all seem to want to harm you._

_11. Don't get tricked into wearing a fuzzy pink apron..._

_12. Don't ever go shopping with Tea! She'll make you wear dresses!_

_13. Don't enter Joey's room without knocking first..._

Yugi blushed at the later. He remembered that day to well and apparently so did Yami for he started snickering softly. Yugi had unknowingly walked in the middle of Joey and Mai, well, getting freaky with it! It was the most embarrassing moment in his life.

"Definitely knock before entering Joey's room." Yugi mumbled starring number thirteen quietly.

"Agreed." Yami chuckled.

"CHOCOLATE!" Was the next thing they heard coming from down stairs.

"Oh no..." Yugi groaned slumping forward onto the paper and desk. "Looks like Grandpa found the chocolate..."

"And I have a feeling that's not a good thing either..." Yami laughed out.

"No it's not." Yugi sighed out lifting his head, the paper sticking to his forehead before falling off back to the desk. "Must I always take care of him? And I thought he was suppose to take care of me..." Yugi then stood up and went down stairs to the possible horrors that awaited him.

Yugi and the Pharaoh came upon the sight of Solomon stuffing his face with chocolate like a two year old the same steam flaring out of his nose and crazed look still there. Pitifully Yami was trying to hold the laugh that wanted to come out, his cheeks puffed out like a toad and hand against his lips to keep it in.

"Grandpa... give me the chocolate." Yugi said slowly as he moved towards Solomon step by step to keep him calm.

"NEVAH!" Solomon howled chocolate all over his face before sprinting away and Yugi chasing him. "I'll nevah give ye me treasure you scallywag!" He sounded a lot like a pirate at the moment and it was rather amusing to watch especially from Yami's point of view.

"Grandpa, come back here!" Yugi panted out as he continued to chase after Solomon. 'How the hell can he be that fast?'

Finally Yami fell into a fit of laughter for what seemed like the umpteenth time that day.

"You can't even catch an old man! AHAHAHAHAHAHA!" Yami laughed himself to tears a second time that day.

'You're not helping in this situation!' Yugi thought with a frown still chasing after his Grandpa before he was too tired to even bother.

"Oh forget this you can have the damn chocolate." Yugi panted slumped over tiredly.

"MUAHAHAHAAA! THE CHOCOLATE IS MINE!" Solomon cackled, before stuffing his face even more as Yugi gave up and went back up stairs.

_14. Don't leave out chocolate where Grandpa can get it.._

_15. Don't enter bathroom when at Tea's house before making sure it's unoccupied or you'll be rewarded with a smack in the face._

_16. Repeat fifteen within ones own house while Tea is over._

"Oh Yugi." Yami laughed wiping away his tears again. "I think this has to be the most I've ever laughed in my entire life."

"Well technically you are dead." Yugi pointed out, "So the correct way to put it would be "since you've been awaken," but other words I understood what you meant..."

"I LIKE CHEESE!" Again more yelling heard from down stairs.

"Ugh now he's in the cheese! I wish he'd tucker out already!" Yugi sighed. "I'm not chasing him again to save the cheese."

"And why not it's entertaining, better then motion pictures!" The Pharaoh laughed out.

"You would say that cause you aren't the one chasing him!" Yugi said with a pout.

_17. Don't leave out Cheese to warm during the day Grandpa will get into it._

_18. Don't attempt to calm down Grandpa when all of the above have happened._

"CHEESY ICECREAM!" Another yell from down stairs came.

"Oh dear God!" Yugi yelled with a pale complexion coming over him, until getting up and sprinting down the stairs to save the ice cream before it was contaminated by swirls of cheese forced into it. "Grandpa no!" Yugi yelped jumping up and snatching the ice cream before anything could happen to it. "Bad Grandpa Bad!" Why did he feel like he was talking to a dog? "Cheese does NOT go in ice cream! Now put that cheese back before I'm forced to eat all this ice cream."

"NEVAH!" Solomon howled shoving the cheese into his mouth.

'Well that's one way to keep cheese out of the ice cream...' Yugi thought with an anime sweat drop.

"Does this happen often?" Yami chuckled. "Cause really I'm beginning to hope it does this is far too amusing."

'You won't be thinking that if I make you chase him down next time.' Yugi smirked.

"Good point. Now where were we?"

'Putting the ice cream away I believe...' Yugi smiled triumphantly as he put the ice cream back into the freezer and retreated back up stairs.

"ICE CREAM!" Solomon was heard shortly after yelling the moment Yugi sat down.

"Well it's better then having him stick cheese in it... The ice cream will slow him down though it usually does." Yugi stated as he moved to add more to number eighteen.

_18. Don't attempt to calm down Grandpa when all of the above have happened. Wait till he gets to the ice cream..._

_19. Don't allow Grandpa to swirl cheese into ice cream not very pleasant to eat._

_20. And last but not least never remove the Millennium Puzzle from ones self there's a high risk it could be stolen._

"There that should do it." Yugi mumbled.

"Nicely done if I do say so myself." Yami added.

"Yugi?" Solomon groaned leaning against the threshold. "Shouldn't you be in bed sleeping?"

Yugi looked up and smirked slightly. 'See told you the ice cream would slow him down...'

"I never said I doubted you now did I?" Yami chuckled.

'No, but still I'm proving my point.' Yugi reasoned.

"I'll go to bed now Grandpa." Yugi said with a broad smile.

"Good." Solomon murmured before quickly running to the bathroom. Cookies, Chocolate, plus Cheese didn't mix very well...

Yugi laughed as he closed his bedroom door turning off the desk lamp and moving to his bed. He crawled in and pulled the covers over his form after putting the list into the small lamp table's drawer and yawned softly.

"Night Pharaoh..."

"Good night Yugi."

And with that our little savior of the ice cream drifted to sleep while the Pharaoh, a five thousand spirit mind you, had no need for sleep for after all he was a spirit. Instead he smiled and watched him sleep while brushing strands of hair off of Yugi's face and placing a soft kiss upon the boys' cheek. 'Sweet dreams my little Prince...'

The End 

RSG: You know that's the first thing I've ever written without an OC in it. I feel so proud of myself! ;laughs; Anyway hope this got a laugh out of you in some way I know it did for me. And yes I'm aware of the slight fluffiness I did between the Pharaoh and Yugi. But I thought it was necessary! Anyway R&R and be nice! This is the first time I've ever touched a Yu-Gi-Oh fic even if it was something to pass the time and get a laugh at. Let alone something with just the Yu-Gi-Oh characters! And I'm going to be really peeved if I see a bazillion hits for this compared to the amount of reviews! READ AND REVIEW! Do not glance at or "My Seto" will have to kick all your Asses for the lack of a sequel!


End file.
